How Do I “Love” You?
There are two four-letter words in the English language that both begin with the letter “L”. One of the words ends in the letter “t”, and the other ends in the letter “e”. There are many people who use the words interchangeably when expressing their intimate feelings for someone. They treat these two words as if their meanings were one in the same, but in reality there exist a chasm between the two. The two words are “Lust” and “Love.”
There are those who feel that their lustful desires are an expression of their “true love” for someone. They base their entire relationship with a person on the supposition that the most important element in that relationship is having those desires fulfilled, and nothing else matters. As a result they find themselves forever in search of “true love” but never finding it because their concept of “true love” is only superficial. For them, “true love” is not enduring, but rather is fleeting, lasting only for the duration of the fulfillment of their lustful desires at that moment.
True love does not always seek to fulfill the lustful desires of the flesh, but rather it is pure and genuine in intent, and finds its pleasure in being with and supporting another. True love comes from the heart and realizes that fulfilling the desires of the flesh is an additional part of a relationship, and not the entire basis for a relationship. True love seeks not to satisfy self, but always seeks to please and to be pleasing to another. True love does not ask the question, “What is in it for me?”, but rather the question that is asked is, “How can we work together, and grow and mature together, to make this an enduring relationship based on our genuine and true love for one another?” When true love is at the forefront of a relationship, that relationship is destined to become a bilateral relationship.
Lust, on the other hand, only seeks self-gratification for that is all it knows and really cares about. It is always in a state of flux, continuously moving from one relationship to another, always wanting to fulfill its desires, but never finding true happiness or real satisfaction in any relationship that it is a part of. Lust always wants to know, “What is in it for me?” Nothing else, or anybody else ever matters. It is shallow, cold-hearted, and callous by nature. It seeks to fulfill its pleasures, but never truly finds lasting pleasure for itself in the fulfillment of those pleasures, for it always begs for more and the more that it gets, the more it wants. When lust is the sole basis for a relationship, that relationship is destined to become a unilateral relationship.
“How do I ‘love” you?” is a question that each individual must answer for themselves through self-examination of their true intent and motives. When a person enters into a relationship he needs to ask himself if he is seeking something that will be enduring, or is he seeking something that is fleeting like the wind. The main word in the vocabulary of lust is “me”. The main words in the vocabulary of true love are “you and me.” Lust stands alone. True love joins together with another to create a harmonious relationship.
